i am awful

 for all de time.... i thought wat u said is right and is for my own good... and i keep on ignore it... and i feel bad of it sometimes... but now... the only thing i feel bad on you is because i didn't give enough time for u... and one thing is that all u predicted... all u think is wrong.. and it some how influence me... now i see things clearly... i know wat i am doing... and wat i should do...

i am awful... but yet... i will whack myself.. and wake myself up... so no worries... i will treat u well... and so do myself and de one i love.. i wont be influence by anything easily now... coz i see things clear now.. u might think i am blur and stupid.. but here i am proudly to say that i am not^^ i love you.. and so do you... i love all de ppl around me that do the same on me too..

I cant... reli cant... i cant ignore you... yet i cant hate you...  First you said that he is no good for me... but as time goes by you started to like him too.. then you said she is a big torn for me... but then time again proves that she has no reason to attack me.. and she wont attack me nor harm me... next you said that that girl is going to be another torn to me... and called me to avoid her.. or just give up coz i cant even beat her... But then she too has nothing to do with me... we had been best friend for a long time... i know her well and so do she... 

You are a bit over rated yourself by predicted at people.... whatever people did..  you will think that they up to something... but is time for me to tell you... i wont listen ... and yet i wont be influence by it... but i will take it as an advice from u... coz now... i know how to look at people... u might be right... and wrong too... but i rather follow my instinct or the sound inside my heart... no matter if i am wrong or right... i am ready for it...

To: another you...

i love you... and sorry for everything that i do to you... i am awful... because of me u broke up with her... u said is the matter of time... so don't feel bad of it... but i cant... coz i am the one who makes her cry... although i don't know she cried because of it annot... but as for a girl... if i met a situation like this i will cry like hell and curse on the guy... i am so sorry.... she trusted you... so much... and i had spoil both of ur relationship.... i screw things up... and i don't know what to do about it... coz this is a long time ago... things that had been done is done.. i can't change anything... but yet... i feel guilty and i am here to say that i am sorry... all i can do is to say sorry... although it wont help... and is late for me to said this...

i am sorry for you to feel bad that time... when i confess to you how u feel is in a big mess.. i am sorry because i had screw up both of ur relationship... i am sorry that i make u feel that u are awful... by ur face.. i see de sadness and miserable.... and i don't wanted to see that again... i will try my best to make u feel that u are the chosen one and the only one to me... coz i cant let it go and i cant ignore all ur feelings...>< can say like u are one part of me now...>< lol....><