u never look back aren't you?

being abandon aside the road... that kind of feeling... i know better than anyone else..
just a sudden.. feels like u are all alone... nobody is beside you.. nobody is going to help you...

the people who abandon you... they left nothing.. but only memories are left to you.. and these.. are the most headache part.. they seems so kind at that time... but now.. they are abandon u aside the road.. thinking, how they can turn away so fast... how can they do this to you? and after this.. you will think they are the cruelest people in the world... but after a minute.. you will feel regret.. and said to yourself.. they sure have reason for this..

then you wait... but you are just lying to yourself.. you try not to think... but you think even more... and started to miss them.. you started to listen to the songs that they suggest you... you started to look back what they write on the message that they send to you... you will just do whatever you can do just to reminds you they are there with you before... and then you will start make stories... make stories to tell yourself that they will come back one day.. is just the matter of time...

after that? you start to feel tired.. can't breathe.. can't walk... can't talk... keep on dreaming and blurring.. don't know what to do.. and you had no mood on everything... walk like a zombi.. when walk on a high place.. u are almost fall...but even you also don't realized it..

when you are alone... feel like crying... looking at the ceiling... wondering... face to the wall.. thinking... eyes started to fill up with tears... but you cant cry it out loud.. donno why... later.. every night.. you try to sleep.. but can't, cause all inside your mind are the memories that they left...it just make your feeling more worst..

in the morning... as always... there is no any signs of them... what you do? you stand up and said to yourself... i can live without you anyways.. so you start to do everything to forget them.. yes you did it^^ and you forget them completely.. you think that you still have your family who always support you.. you still have your beloved friends.. so what is the point t remember them? yea... you totally forgot...

congrats^^ yay^^
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when time passing... days after days... their faces their action... everything they did.. is more remarkable.. and you can't even forget.. yes.. you may not be as stupid like last time.. but when you are all alone.. you will start crying... you try everything.. but those people who abandon you... those who are use to be like an angel to you... they are just another devil who are keeping torturing you...but... these devil... you just can't take away them completely from your life...

missing them... i really miss them...

-to those who had treat me so well, so kind, but abandon me-